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How Japan Prepares Its Children for Independence
// Later On
Kate Lewis writes in Savvy Tokyo:
Last week, my two-year-old son took a 'secret' field trip. His yochien(preschool) packed up all of their child class students, took them on a bus, and would not tell us where.
When we learned about the plan, the other American parents and I looked at each other in excited disbelief. "This would never happen in America," we whispered, conscious of the mountains of forms and waivers that would have been deemed necessary back home for such a trip. Yet we weren't horrified or worried. We were delighted.
The reasoning behind the 'secret' field trip was simple: this was the children's first adventure without their parents. The yochien did not want us moms to show up, one of the other mothers laughingly translated for us. They joked that one or two of us might sneak to the park to watch this first solo outing, and it was important that the children take this small step toward independence alone.
Next year, my son—at three—will ride the bus to yochien by himself. By five and six, Japanese children often take public transit or walk to school without their parents.
My mother, back in America, was horrified when she heard this. "They walk by themselves? The whole way? He's far too little for that," she said, when I mentioned it off-hand.
Yet to an outsider like me, Japan does an excellent job of preparing its children for independence, in a way that America—with its love of helicopter parenting and loathing of 'free-range' parenting—often does not.
It begins slowly. Our yochien eased us into the transition of attending school, even though the toddlers only attended one or two days per week. It was still an adjustment, and the school treated it as such. The moms attended the first several days of class, and the first field trips. When the children finally attended their first solo day of class, nearly a month had gone by.
And it is in this way, bit by bit, that Japanese children build up independence. With only 1.7% of Japanese schoolchildren riding a bus (according to research from the American-based Safe Routes to School National Partnership (SRTS)), and some schools banning cars from doing drop-offs, walking to school is often a necessity in Japan. Yet children aren't simply shown the door and expected to find the way to school by themselves. Independence is a skill taught through weeks of practice: learning the route holding the hand of a parent, meeting the shop owners along the way, navigating the landmarks with a parent following a block behind. It's making sure the children not only know how to do it, but also know how to do it safely.
Most importantly, the wider community in Japan also helps foster children's independence. Neighbors who see children walking or playing alone don't call the police, nor do the police arrest the parents. Instead, they help.
When the SRTS sent its deputy director to Tokyo in 2011 to learn about Japanese methods, among their findings was that community participation was crucial in helping the system work as well as it does—and in helping parents feel confident in letting their children go.
The route to school for a Japanese child often includes volunteer crossing guards, signs designating safe shops and homes in case of emergencies, and even neighborhood chimes reminding playing children to head home at dark. In this way, everyone pitches in to ensure children can be both independent and safe, providing a framework to allow them freedom. . .
Filed under: Daily life, Education, Mental Health
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